Maybe I Was Wrong?!

“Orange.”

I’ve always said orange was my favorite color.

It's on my logo, my pillows, even my plates.

But about four years ago, over coffee at Alpine Modern in Boulder, I realized I might have been wrong.

I was sitting with my accountant, Loc — the kind of person who balances spreadsheets with heart.

We were talking about life, not numbers this time.

I had just launched a course for n’betweeners for the very first time — to give us language for our mental health experiences — and I was sharing with him why this work mattered so deeply to me.

He smiled softly and said, “That reminds me of my son, Lincoln.”

Loc is raising Lincoln within his intergenerational Vietnamese immigrant family community.

One day, he asked his son what his favorite color was.

Lincoln didn’t even pause.

He said, “Rainbow.”

Not blue. Not yellow.

Rainbow

His dad pushed back, “Your favorite color cannot be rainbow."

Lincoln persisted, “Of course it can, it’s ALL the colors in one."

Children just get it.

That moment has never left me. 

That story encompasses what it means to be an n’betweener.

 As n’betweeners, we’re taught to pick one —

one identity, one belonging, one side of the story.

But Lincoln’s answer held a kind of wisdom most adults spend a lifetime forgetting.

Rainbows appear when opposites meet — when sunlight touches rain.

They remind us that beauty is born in the both-and, not the either-or.

That’s the essence of being an n’betweener.

Someone who lives between worlds — who refuses to be reduced to one thing.

We’re not in conflict. We hold the multiplicity.

As n’betweeners, we live in motion — flying between cultures, languages, and ways of being.

We’re like birds that can soar above and rest on the ground.

We hold perspectives others can’t access.

But it’s not easy.

It takes courage to keep flying through atmospheres not meant for our wings.

We weather storms most people never feel.

And still — we rise, as Maya would say. 

We turn pain into perspective.

We turn difference into depth.

We turn the space between worlds into color.

Loc has named his company after his son — LincolnLoc.

That’s the magic of being an n’betweener.

We don’t choose one color. We are the spectrum.

Thank you, Lincoln.

Much gratitude to your wisdom.

P.S. Meet the boy who made me rethink everything — yes, rainbow is the new orange.